THE LIFE OF A WRITER

Only a fellow writer really knows and understands both the satisfaction and the pain of being a writer.  The satisfaction comes from putting together a sentence that you don't have to rework because as it flows onto the paper... doesn't end in a preposition.  I am not sure if that is considered a big 'no no' anymore...but, I'm old school so, I do all that I can to work around not ending a sentence with a preposition.  The painful part, which there are many but the one that comes to mind is when you have a great idea or a perfect sentence on the tip of your tongue and someone else is blabbing to you and you can't get away to write it down so that you won't forget it.  I have been known to pull out a Kleenex, a piece of paper, a receipt, anything and write those ideas down when I can't just run over to my computer.  I do say 'excuse me' for one moment - and mention that I need to write this down before I forget.  Friends and acquaintances know me well enough to know what is happening when I start writing on my hand.  

I am a writer of stories.  Out loud, or just in my head and then sometimes onto paper or typed into my computer.  I have self-published one book, and I have six other stories in a variety of 'not done yet" stages.  

In addition to writing books, I blog.  I think of blogs as short stories.  Easier to get into, easier to finish.  So, I blog more often than I write on any of my longer stories. I have blogged for over 13 years and during that time, I have written well over one hundred blogs.   My blogs are generally, about 'whatever'.  The whatever is that thing that moves me at that moment in time.  'Whatever' generally keeps building and growing and rolling around in my mind until I get it out and on paper/computer.  Often, it is about a flash of a remembered memory of some past event(s) or a special place in my long, much-lived life.  Other times it is about something that I just noticed for the first time or am viewing with a different eye.  Often it is a fleeting thought or feeling that I decide to expand upon.  That thought or feeling just seems to catch in my mind rather than just the regular 'float through'. So, there it is wanting its story to be told.  I start expanding on that thought or feeling, generally very quickly, and it most often becomes a blog but could end up in one of my - in the process - books.   

When these thoughts occur and linger...if I can, I sit right down at my computer, and the words just seem to flow.  If they do not...I have learned to just stop...because it just might not be the right time, mood or the whole story is just still just simmering in my writer's brain. And, anything that I write feels forced and meets my 'I love it' - clap my hands stage.  

 I am not sure a writer's brain is more of a left brain or right brain activity or if it has its own place somewhere in the middle.  I feel that way because my stories always contain some fact, a bit of research but also a whole lot of whimsey, fun, silliness, heartwarming events and just generally a softer, lighter, warmer way of looking at well, anything.  So, the middle.    

I am also a very active crafter.  I look at everything in this world as a possible component or idea for a whimsical, fun or even possibly useful item to create.  When I become 'really present' in any situation, my mind goes to the 'what if's. or 'what abouts'.  And then, my flow goes as long and as hard as it does.  When I am somewhere other than home, I feel like I want to just get home so that I can take those ideas and either sit at my computer and let it all spill out or climb the stairs up to my craft room and begin pulling together what my mind's eye has begun to design. 

Everywhere I go, I am always picking up sticks, rocks, acorns or anything that appeals to my creative self.  I am fortunate enough to live out in the woods with plenty of natural objects to pick up.  Sometimes I need to remind myself to look up and around because, I am always looking down for the next find.  

Living much of our time in our old log cabin and some of the time in our intown Victorian in and of itself provides the motivation for so many stories.  

When out at the log cabin, we have animals to feed and tend to (there is that preposition).  After feeding and tending to our animals if it is winter or inclement...I fill the feed bins, make sure the waterer is working, throw hay, give a few rubs and then run back to my waiting truck and head back to the log cabin.  If our woodstove isn't already blazing away, I start a fire or add more wood.  A warm, crackling fire always adds to a creative mood.  Something about the radiant warmth and the snapping sounds makes me feel all cozy and ready to either write, create or take a cat nap...with my two cats.  

The same goes for when we are at our Victorian home intown.  Just the history and the beauty of this older home always make my mind drift into yesteryear and the way this house was when it was first built and occupied.  Who lived here, what did the family conversations sound like.  There is a carriage house in the back of the property, so they did have horses and a carriage of some sort.  And then possibly eventually an automobile.  Did they go for rides on Sundays?  Possibly out towards where our log cabin is located.  A drive out into the country.  

We have been able to go to the county seat of each of our two homes/property and look up as much history as they have for both of the homes/property.  I have found quite a bit of information about each of these homes.  I will use that information to write separate blogs on each.  I will also add, what I always add to all of my blogs and stories. Details that I am sure were present...because I can actually, mentally, put myself into those times and feel all that I think my characters felt and how they lived during those times.

This is our log cabin when it was nearing completion... 

This is one of the entrances to our Victorian home.

Both homes and their histories are so rich and provide so much material to me as a writer.  I am blessed to have both of these homes/properties and experience the two different lifestyles.  

 

 add to an existing.  Or I might just put it on the shelf for a later date in time

MY WILDLIFE CHARCUTERIE TABLE

 

My husband and I purchased and renovated a 100 yr. old log cabin on 40 acres in the Upper Peninsula in the State of Michigan.   There are hundreds of acres of state-owned land around our 40 acres...so, no neighbors...just wildlife. Our acreage is comprised of about 15 acres of wooded land, 15 acres of grassy fields and about 10 acres of land that had been previously gardened for many years - original settlers and relatives.  It is our 'out of the city', woodland home. When we purchased the old log cabin...it was pretty rough, so we also purchased an old Victorian home in the UP but in the City of Menominee, MI about 45 minutes away from this woodland paradise. We purchased it for a place to stay when we were doing the heavy duty, dirty work at the log cabin. We love both places and enjoy the beauty and benefits of each.   Sometimes, the peace and quiet of hearing and feeling all that nature offers is just what we need to recharge our mind, body and spirit.  Sometimes seeing our neighborhood friends and enjoying all of the conveniences of city living is just what we need.  We feel blessed to have both to enjoy.  

Out on the acreage, initially we just threw a few chairs and a folding table into the back of our pickup truck and drove out into our woods.  Since we purchased this acreage, up until now, we had been spending the majority of our time renovating the log cabin, planting gardens (cut flower and vegetable) and tending to all of our animals which is a daily responsibility.  We have chickens, peacocks, llamas and fiber sheep.  But now that most everything is basically under control, but not complete, it is time to start exploring our woods.  We need to take a bit of time away from the renovations and just go sit in the woods and relax.   Up until now, we would just walk around in the woods noticing various wildflowers, check out animal tracks and marvel at the scratch and rub marks on the stumps and trees made by the local bears. We loved walking in the woods but thought a nice comfortable place to sit would be much nicer than sitting on uncomfortable, fallen dead trees.  Now, when we go for walks in our woods, we will take some time to relax in our chairs, breath in the fresh pine air and try to quiet any chatter that might be going on in our heads.  We love to listen to the refreshing, swirling winds high up in the pines.  

My always busy, always moving mind actually slows down and relaxes for a while sitting in our woods. But after a while, as usual, my creative juices would begin flowing, my thoughts would start rolling and I would begin creating. I am creating something about 99.9% of the time.  Many times, it would be a new craft item, a different garden design, an easy but good recipe, a different or multi use of a space...on and on...no real limits when my creative juices begin to flow. 

 When we first started spending more time out in the woods, we didn't really see that many birds or critters.  We were used to feeding birds and squirrels on the deck at the log cabin and also at our home in the city.  So, we thought, why not also put up feeders in our woods.  We are a couple of real bird watchers.  We search out and look for birds everywhere we go.  Binoculars are standard equipment in each of our vehicles. We joked about that the birds and critters were probably watching us from a distance.  The didn't really know if we were friend or foe, so they were staying safe until we make our intentions known.  Maybe they were thinking...are these not the same people that feed us up at the log cabin?   

After a few walks out into our woods, we decided to hang up a few bird feeders and then proceeded to fill them with seed every time we would walk out there.  While we were quietly sitting there, we would see an occasional bird fly in and take a seed and then fly off.  When we would return on another day, the feeders would all be empty...so, we knew that they had found our seed feeders.  I also decided to put a container on the ground for the little critters. I put peanuts, sunflower seeds and acorns that I had collected into this container for the smaller ground feeders.  The chipmunks and the squirrels quickly found this buffet.   I almost tripped over the chipmunks as they came running for a seed or a peanut.  We were so entertained by their comings and goings.  We kept putting out treats the whole time we were out there.  We were not sure if the same chipmunk or the same squirrel was coming by, eating a bit, stuffing its cheeks and scampering away only to return in a few moments.  Or, if there were several.  We were just glad to provide them with food and hoped that they were putting some of the seed away for the long winters that we have UP north.   

Creating a wildlife feeding table became my next creative project out in our beautiful woods.  It became another avenue for creativity for me.  It began by spreading out the seeds, peanuts, corn and collected acorns on the table right in front of us.  As I would sit there, I would begin arranging all of these goodies into some sort of design.  This design began to grow with every visit.  

  It took a while but soon we would see birds landing on branches all around us.  And then suddenly one would land on the table, look around, grab a seed and take off rather quickly.  We would sit perfectly still and enjoy our close up look at our bird visitors.  We were overjoyed.  City birds become accustomed to our presence and don't really scare away very easily...but out here where they don't see people that often...they needed to check us out before spending anytime near us.  

  One day was especially amazing.  We could hear the familiar sounds of Chickadees in the distance, and it sounded like quite a few of them.  All of a sudden, we had Chickadees flying and landing all around us...kind of like a swarm of bees.  They were landing on branches all around us, on the feeders, on the table and on the ground.  And then, they began landing on us.  We were honored that they felt this comfortable to be near and around us.     

My always busy mind thought if they come for seed type items, they might also stop by for apples, and other fresh foods.  So, after going through my refrigerator and picking out the iffy veggies and fruit and also the ends of bread, I would pack them up to take out to what would become the wildlife charcuterie table. 

When we would arrive at the table in the woods, I would pull out all of my bags of fresh produce and just sit at the table for a while.  I would spread out the items that I brought and devise a pattern using the types, shapes, size and colors of the food.   Being the person that I am, I started out with simple displays of food, but each time I would set a new table, my display of food became more involved.    I am sure that the deer and other visitors to the table noticed the artistic growth. (?) 

 

My husband would wander around the woods while I would chop, design and layout my latest table. I would end the woodland visit by taking a picture of my latest creation. When we would return to the table, I would also take an 'after' picture. 

 We began to routinely walk in our woods every few days.  I would immediately walk over to the table to see if there was any food left and if so, what foods did they seem to like and what food offering did they not like to eat.

They local wildlife seemed to love apples, strawberries, peanuts, acorns, sunflower seeds, pears, corn on the cob, carrots, berries and homemade oatmeal cookies, and sometimes bread.  But they absolutely did not like oranges, romaine lettuce, corn silk or corn husks, nor did they like the pumpkin I left for a Halloween treat.  I had always seen pictures of what squirrels did to a carved pumpkin.  In eating the pumpkin, they would further carve the eyes, nose and mouth.  The one I carved and set out, was not even touched...just festive and fun for them, I hoped.  

We have a trail cam, and I decided to put it on a nearby tree to see just who actually visited our table when we were not in the area.    Initially it was a variety of critters, squirrels, birds, possums, chipmunks, turkeys, and some deer.  And then, it became mostly all deer.  So, once I had seen more deer than I ever wanted to...I took down the trail cam.  The weather was beginning to shift, and I knew that I would not be putting out all of this fresh food on this table for too much longer. When we would put on our boots and heavier jackets and trudge out into our woods in the cold and possible rain or snow, I would fill the covered feeders to the top and cover the table with seed, peanuts, acorns, and corn. I don't think a bit of rain or snow would stop them from eating the dry seeds.  As we would walk away, I would wish them all a good night's rest.  And, hoped that our dear visitors would have a peaceful winter, I told them that we would be back again when the winter weather would begin to break.  

Some of the best advice that you will ever hear will come from the forest....

MESSAGES FROM A LOVED ONE WHO HAS PASSED....

 

I am quite sure that I feel my mother's presence for just a fleeting moment once in a while.  It's been well over twenty years since we said our last 'I love you" to each other while she was still on this earth.  I am not sure that this connection happens because I am either thinking so deeply about her that I actually create these feeling within myself...or if she was thinking of me and was able to enter into my thoughts or dreams.  

A moment after I feel her presence a warm and wonderful sensation washes over me.  I have tried to logically explain how these experiences happen. Do we feel our loved one's presence when memories are prompted by something we see, smell or experience that remind us of them?  Do we feel their presence during a particularly emotional time? I prefer to think that quite possibly, we are able to be contacted by a departed loved one when they feel the need to be there with us or for us.  I don't really have to know how this all happens or really why.  I just need to allow the thoughts and feelings to flow, give it my attention and truly appreciate those warm and wonderful moments.  

   When these moments occur, I don't recall thinking about anything really specific.  Nor did I have a current situation that I felt needed any guidance from above.  But there she was.  Her beautiful face in my mind's eye, her scent, her smile and her sweet voice.  I could feel her love. When this happens, it generally makes me smile.  But other times my throat would momentarily tighten up and a tear or two would escape and slide down my cheek.  As quickly as this feeling comes, it goes. I kind of fight it off because I don't want my special moments with my mom to feel sad.  

It seems like as I get older, it happens much more often.  Possibly because I have more time to just let my thoughts wander.  Or, is it that I am going back over my life from time to time as we all do as we age.   Good times and bad times...things I was glad that I had done and things that I regretted doing.  Usually when I have those thoughts, I take a moment to stop the flow...be thankful for the good times and good decisions and also forgive myself and others for the not so good times or decisions.   I try to let go of the unpleasant times and decisions and hold even tighter to the good times and beneficial decisions.  

When I think about aging, my life, my children, my grandchildren or my future and have any feelings of being unsure of the right path, I can hear my mom say...I know...I know...honey...it will all be fine, you will make the right decisions, just keep living and loving,,,,

After retiring from my career in Social Service, a friend of mine who managed an Adult Care Center offered me a job. So, in a nursing capacity, I started working again and I loved it.  I had the privilege of working with residents who were older than myself.  While caring for them I would love to listen to the stories of their lives. I loved the way that they told their stories.  They always kept eye contact, spoke slowly and softly with their lips always in a soft smile. Even when the stories were not the happiest...they found some way to find joy in just having had that someone or that something in their life.  I also found strength and encouragement in their view of their current position in life.  Most of them had pictures of loved ones all around their rooms.  A few of them had articles of clothing of their departed loved ones tucked under their pillows to be near them as they slept.  And a few of them talked about how their loved ones contacted them by way of a bright red Cardinal landing on the tree branch right outside of the window in their room.  Or how a dragon fly or butterfly landed near them when out for a walk in the center's gardens.  It is not for anyone to judge whether this was true or not.  All that was important was that it meant something to the person who did believe that they were being contacted and shown love from a dearly departed loved one.  

The vision of what they believed was a sign gave them a feeling of connection to someone that they missed and loved.  It filled them with hope and joy.  It made them feel that their loved one missed and thought of them often, also.  

 When I lie in bed in the evening before I fall asleep, with nothing distracting me, I feel that I can create a loving scenario whereby they know that I am thinking of them.  And, if they are not busy with their heavenly chores, they would possibly come to me in my thoughts or in my dreams.  

However it all happens, it happens differently for each of us...but I do believe that we are able to still have a connection to those that have passed.  Death does not end memories, does not end our love nor does it stop our thoughts of our loved one.  I believe that all of these visits go on forever and ever...Amen.  

AGING

 We all start aging from the very moment of conception.  Discussion about aging and feeling the effects of aging seem to come up much more often later in life...when we are 'Older', "Over the Hill" and "Well Seasoned". The words 'aging' and 'older' and, any number of terms become common place once we have reached our 'golden years'.  

Not sure what is so golden about these years...but I'm going to keep trying to find the gold at the end of this rainbow at this point in the aging process.  Fortunately, so many older, often used, negative terms are being used less and less these days.  Those that choose to, have discovered and are using much nicer terms to talk about and reference senior citizens.  We are different than our parents when they were our age...but, we are still, none the less, arrowing down quite a bit to get to our birth year.    There are things that are more difficult for us to do as we age, but we still do it.  but at a different level and speed.   

My generation, Baby Boomers, are a large part of the population (2nd largest generation by population share).  We have an increased longevity despite having more health issues and have a significant impact on the economy and resources.  

We are Boomers. My husband and I bought 40 acres and an old log cabin when we retired.  We were older, but still able to do renovations and all that is required of this endeavor.  Initially we were good, but year after year became a bit harder.  So, we decided it was time to start adapting things to make our everyday chores and activities easier and safer for us because we still wanted the life that we had looked so forward to.  

We had achieved one of our major goals with this property in that we were able to raise most all of our own food...veggies, fruit, meat chickens and laying hens.  Most everything was still at the initial kind of slap together stage since we had to get the animal and bird pens made, feeding and watering systems in place even before we got to work putting together a working bathroom for us. It was now time to take each of those chores and adapt it to a system that would be easier and more doable for us to do as we aged.  We began building raised beds for the plants that would continue to do well in contained areas.  We put together more efficient watering and feeding systems for our birds and animals.  And, we made better, more level walking paths for us to get to all of our animals and gardens.  We also decided to put up some greenhouses so that we could grow food year-round and also have more control over invasive weeds and critters.  We'll share...but, not all of it please dear local wildlife.  We felt that having all of these chores and physical work involved was really good for us as long as we took precautions and basically just took our time.  It kept our minds and bodies active and gave us something to look forward to each day.  We loved all of our animals and birds...they were our friends and family - they were a large part of our social and interactive life.   

The commonly used term about 'Aging Gracefully" is mentioned quite a bit. This often-used term is easier for me to comprehend and live with than the "Golden Years'.  I can see some positives in that 'Gracefully' term. Aging gracefully to me means that we need to treasure the past, live in the present and embrace the future.  Sounds, all positive to me.  

 Here's the comparison that I can wrap my head around:  My husband has had a long career in the construction industry.  He owned and operated a construction company that became well known for his expertise in the renovation of older homes.  I was mostly in the healthcare/social services industry but had several other careers in between.  In addition to our careers, our hobby/love was buying older homes that probably not many others would have purchased...and we would renovate them.  After closing on the purchase of these old beauties, many times, we would live in them while we would renovate and then either sell or continue to live in and enjoy them for however long and then sell.  

We would instantly know when we would view an older home that was currently on the market...if it was going to be the next one for us to love and renovate. We have passed on a few, but not many. Our desire was to bring them back to life and use.  Initially, we would take our time getting to know the house, get a feel for its essence.  The essence was always there if one would take the time, take a seat and look past the damage done by weather, age and the neglect of people.  We would study the house, look deeper than the exterior wear and tear of aging and lack of care.  We could see it's still strong bones and feel it's soul.  Then, we would jump in and bring back these older beauties and make them breathe and shine again.  We believe that the old house quietly listened to us when we would discuss its many great attributes.  And, that our intention was to not drastically change it, but bring it back to its original beauty. The renovated houses all seemed to smile back at us when we would finally paint it's exterior a new, fresh coat of paint.  Our old log cabin and our big old Victorian are and will be our last home renovations.  We will continue to renovate and repair and even build whatever out buildings that we need...but as far as purchasing a fixer upper to renovate...those days are over.  We have loved each and every one of them...but we are trying to remember that we are now older, and we have to change our thinking about what we honestly can and cannot do.  

It took quite a bit of strength and endurance for these old houses to still be standing after all of the years and seasons of extreme weather conditions. We were always grateful and proud of them that they still stood strong after so many years.  So, it was always our pleasure to attend to their needs and bring them back to their former glory.   

I feel like this is similar to the way we human beings age.  We come into this world all shiny and new. Then life gives us a few bumps and bruises, but we're still young, we heal.  But then one day, we don't heal quite as quickly, and we begin to see and feel the effects of our old scars.  

So, what do we do at this stage?  We can either just give in and accept those battle wounds or try and make them not the focus of our life - gracefully. 

We have been recreating ourselves over and over our entire life.  And one shouldn't stop because of reaching a certain age.  We should stand up straight, look into the mirror and decide that this person who possibly had babies, worked many hours at our homes and/or in a career, took care of our children, spouse or partner and then our older relatives is understandably in need of a retooling. So, here we are without as much energy as we once had needing to make another adjustment. This is when 'gracefully' comes into play.  Embrace who you've been, who you've become, lift your head and add a touch of grace to it all.  Time to shine softly, graciously and gratefully for a life well lived.  We survived and should live out the rest of our years in gentle peacefulness and joy.  

Aging is inevitable, so changing and adjusting as we get older is how we survive.  And we can also thrive.  We just need to realize that the aging process is normal for all of us.  We can buck it all, a bit, but ultimately accepting and living the best lives that we can, is the key to a happy life.  So, Aging Gracefully is not a negative term, it is an absolutely lovely way to celebrate our "Golden Years".         

 

   

THE LITTLE SPIDER'S FAVORITE FLOWER

 

Ahhh...what a beautiful night.  It has cooled off nicely after a hot, humid day.  Looking up at the full moon and watching a sky full of a million twinkling stars, this little spider began to think about the chores for the day ahead.  The sun will be up in a few hours, and I have a lot of things on my 'to do' list.  After a few more hours of rest, relaxation and planning, I was ready for the new day.  After stretching each of my eight legs and yawning a big, long, satisfying yawn, I'm ready to get going.  Oh look, my breakfast is ready.  Right here on my web.  After filling my tummy with delicious treats from the bug buffet, I needed to concentrate on mending the loose silk on my web.  The air was already feeling pretty humid, I think it is going to be another hot day here in UP Michigan.  It is August.  But I must keep up with the maintenance of my home no matter the temperature or the weather.  

I spy, with one of my eyes, the lady of the house heading my way.  I built my house in one of her plant boxes under the front windows of her home.  She is dragging a garden hose...good news to cool off, bad news that she might use a higher power setting and just blow me and my web right out of here.  But, good news, she lays the hose on the ground under the low evergreens that are below the plant box, to give them a good soak.  Then, she reaches up and starts picking around the flowers in my plant box.  From my closer than I like, viewing position, she appears to be deadheading the flowers that are now dried and swiveled and are past their beautiful glory days.  This plant box is planted with Nasturtiums, Marigolds, Alyssum, a tall spike, some flowing Vinca Vines, a few Begonias and some Yellow Gerber Daisies.  The Marigolds have a strong smell, but the rest of the plants only have a faint lovely aroma, which I prefer.   I am particularly fond of the Nasturtiums.  They come in so many beautiful fall colors.  Light and dark oranges, yellows, reds and combinations of all of those colors.  They are edible, have fun shaped leaves and produce an attractive round ball that is their seed. 

I do wander off of my web occasionally to take a break from my web design, to check out all of the beautiful plants.  I also wander about to check and make sure that any other spiders or bugs that are present or are just traveling through. If I find any visitors, I make sure that they are not thinking of staying any longer than a short visit.  If they are courteous and respect my presence, which I immediately make known, I don't mind that they are stopping off for a while to enjoy the beautiful plants.  But, if they happen to be a spider and they are thinking about taking up residency in my plant box, I will hide in the flowers and allow them to start weaving a web and then I will go in and cut all of their threads, and they will sail off into the wild blue yonder.  Other bugs, I allow to stay for a while and then I go over and shoo them away.  

One day, as a game, I started counting the developing seeds that the lovely Nasturtiums were producing.  I began to count them each day just to make sure that they were all there.  Also, I add to the count any new seeds that had developed.  And, for a long time, each time I would count, they would all be present and accounted for.  

One morning, after breakfast and before starting my mending chores, I counted and recounted my precious seeds and discovered that there were a few missing.  Looking down to the ground, I realized that when the seeds become large enough, their weight would put strain on the stem, and they would fall to the ground.  

I decided that my new job was to wind my silky threads around each of the precious seeds to keep them securely in my plant box.  It did take me quite a while to find each seed and create the silk and wrap each one with its own safety line.   It was kind of fun discovering a new purpose for my weaving and my tying skills.  

After doing that, I was happy knowing that all of the remaining seeds would be with me for the season...UNTIL...the lady of the house discovered the seeds.  The Nasturtiums seeds look like wrinkly little peppercorns. They are so fun to discover, touch and hold for further examination.   While the hose was running down below, she decided to start not only deadheading the flowers that were past their glory days...but also started picking my precious seeds.  She would find one and pick it with her right hand and then place it in her left hand to collect.  I obviously did not tie my silk line on all of the seeds.  She was able to just reach in and pick them.  Oh well...

I wandered off to the side of the plant box so as to not to alert her to the fact that I was living there.  The next seed that she went after looked like it was a goner...right hand picked the seed...transferred it to her left hand...and then to my peeking pleasure, BOING...it recoiled right back into place.  My silk threads had worked...I was so proud of my work.  But she did not give up. Plucked the same seed...right hand to left hand and it flew out of her hand again.  But this time, it landed on a tall evergreen that is planted right next to the plant box.  I can swing over and retrieve the seed later...no problem   But, she must have thought that a third time would be the charm and went in again for the seed.  With renewed effort, she plucked the seed, and it went from her right hand to the left hand and did not recoil this time.  My thread was broken.  It broke my little heart.  Even though this is her house, these are her plant boxes and these are her plants, I just wanted to live here and collect those special seeds.   After plucking a few more seeds, she looked pleased and wandered off to another part of her gardens.  

Initially, I was mad, then sad and then I generally go into my best phase...strategizing.  I think I have a new plan to save my seeds.  I will pluck them when they are ready to detach and bury them in the dirt of the plant box.  This way, I get to keep them, know where they are and quite possibly...they will grow into more colorful Nasturtiums for all to enjoy.  

This plan allows me to reclaim my time to devote to my main responsibility...tending to my web.  The seeds are kind of tricky to lasso and then tie up securely enough to not allow them to fall to the ground.  Now that I know that the determined lady of the house will just keep plucking the seeds until she is satisfied - I realize that my initial plan was futile.  So, after untying all of the remaining seeds I decide to bury them in the dirt.  This should work. Now I can finally feel like I can begin mending my web home without fretting about losing my seeds.

This all works...I get to hold and play with my favorite seeds, bury them in the warm, moist soil and watch them grow into more beautiful flowers that produce more seeds.  And she won't be as keen coming over to look for them...when she can't find any.  Finally...they are all mine.  All warm and snug  right here in my plant box, right under my web...the way it should be.  On with today's work.  OH NO, here she comes with the hose again...it's shower time...hang on...Ahhhh..that actually felt pretty good on this hot day.  Thanks lady of the house.  Now, go away and let this little spider get on with its daily work.  

OUR LITTLE TIPO...AND HIS BIG PERSONALITY...

 

Tipo is our sweet, older gentleman...Chihuahua.  He came into our lives as a surrendered little guy of 5 years old.  He and his sister were at the Humane Society where we were living in WI.  When I called to see if this cute little guy and girl were still available, I was told that the little girl had already been adopted.  I was a bit disappointed as my plan was to keep them together, but it was not to be. 

  We hurried over to meet this little guy.  I'll never forget the first time he was introduced to us.  A member of the Humane Society staff brought him out to us on a leash.  He was wearing a plaid bow tie.  He walked through the door and sat down right in front of us as though he was inspecting us.  At that moment, I knew that he would become a wonderful member of our animal crew.  He was small in stature, but large in the attitude department.  A typical Chihuahua I've since learned.  The bold colored bow tie was perfect for this little (big) guy.  It is his signature look.  He wears one of his many bowties when we go for a walk or for rides on my three-wheel bike.  He loves viewing the neighborhood from the basket on my bike.  If he could jump up in there by himself, he would.  When I tell him that we're going for a ride, he jumps around until I lift him up into his basket.  He takes on his whole Chihuahua personality as soon as we take off.   He stands with his front feet on the front of the basket and often times barks at 'whatever'.    

  In the Meet & Greet Room at the Humane Society, while initially sitting in front of us, he continued to really check us out for a few minutes. He looked from me to my husband, up and down.    I thought I would slowly reach down and let him smell me.  He smelled my hand and my arm and then allowed me to pick him up.  I placed him between my husband and I, so that he could check us both out.  He seemed to be relaxed, sniffed us both and he let us both pet him. 

 He had brought a little stuffed bunny out with him to meet us.  After sitting between us for a while, he jumped down and retrieved his little bunny.  He jumped back up between us on the couch with his beloved bunny.  The staff member told us that he was surrendered with his sister and this stuffed bunny.  I felt that it was his touch with his dear sister and to the first five years of his life.  He still has that stuffed bunny.  But now after 8 years, and many washings, it is now just a small square piece of fuzzy fabric. This precious piece of cotton stays in his bed, and he checks on it daily.  He sleeps with us but keeps his toys and bones/treats in his little bed, right next to our bed.  We purchased a little stairway for him to use to get up on our bed so that there was less chance of him hurting himself going up and down.   

We have had many fluffy family members and most of them were larger breeds.  Tipo was our first small dog. We have loved them all, but as we age, a little one is much more in line with what we can handle.  He is smaller and lighter to lift and is easier to walk on a leash.  We also have an older dog, Sadie, that we have had since birth.  We had raised goldendoodles and kept one of the pups, Sadie.  She was now in her 'golden years'.  But now having little Tipo in all of our lives, it really seemed to pep Sadie up...like a playful puppy again in many ways.  

We have moved from our hobby farm in WI to UP Michigan.  He has been our good boy for about 8 years now...so, he is 13 years old and is doing well.  I believe that he and his sister were taken very good care of but had to be surrendered for hopefully, a loving reason - owners possibly aging and/or entering a nursing facility...I like to think that...because he is very healthy, well-mannered and just a love...no signs of abuse or neglect thankfully. He does use the house as his bathroom occasionally...but not enough to be a real problem. 

 At times I wish that rescued animals could tell you about their past so that you could do your best to help them figure it all out.  Help them to deal with their past and let them know that they are now in a safe and loving place.  

Probably the best thing to do is to start fresh with good food, exercise, lots of play time, a loving, comfortable home.  Lots of pets, smiles, snuggling and love all day long.    He does not like when someone raises their voice, but I don't think anyone does.  He does not run or hide so, I still believe that he was in a normal loving home before he came to us.  He is not afraid of fireworks. Does not even flinch...the only reactions I see are, when a dog or animal comes on the television, his ears perk up and he runs to the edge of the bed (where I many times watch television before going to sleep) and barks...And, when I let him out in the morning, he runs out, thinking that there are squirrels to chase away...which there are most of the time.  

UPDATE: Some years later (sometimes I write a blog over a number of years...happens)...Our Sadie dog passed away...Tipo's friend of many years.  After a while, we thought a nice way to honor Sadie, our dog, was to go to the local Humane Society in Menominee MI and look at the cats that we previewed on-line.  Not really knowing what age or type we were looking for...we just kind of let the cat pick us.  I walked around thinking that possibly an older one would be perfect for us and a furever home for the elder cat.  My husband was walking around talking to each cat.  One of them really talked back to him and he fell in love with her.  She was named Sadie and she was 1 yr. 2 months old and she was quite the gabber.  Perfect. Giving a loving home to a cat already named Sadie, after losing our dear Sadie dog. 

Sadie, the cat, now lives with us...and Tipo.  Tipo is now 15 years old and quite gray and kind of grumpy.  Sadie is helping to keep him young by just generally teasing him...but is also adding to his grumpiness.  She has a habit of following him...if he runs, she runs along next to him...like when we let him in, give him his treat and he runs to his bed.  She is right there at the door when he scratches to come in, watches closely as we give him a treat and then runs with him to his little bed...which is mostly hers now.  

We came home one day and Tipo was up on one of our chairs and to get closer to us, he jumped to another chair - basically staying off of the ground.  We thought it was odd.  He is usually on the floor jumping up on the backs of our legs and wagging his tail when we come home.  Soon we realized that he was avoiding the little fuzzy alligator on the floor...Sadie cat.  We joked about setting up a monitor to see what actually goes on when we are not at home.  I think that generally they both nap quite a bit ..but Sadie does get into her 'zoomie' moods and I think she would like Tipo to play with her...but, he is not up for that kind of play.  So, she may play around him in hopes that he will play with her...and he just wants to finish his nap.  They work it out though.  Tipo does seem glad to see us and, I'm sure hopes that we will keep Sadie busy so that he does not have to deal with her alone.  

Life goes on...both of them nap quite a bit.  Sadie follows Tipo around a lot...he just ignores her and then she eventually runs off and finds something else to mess with besides Tipo.  She does keep him on his toes which I think helps to keep him active and in better health.  

She has turned out to be a perfect fit to our home and really to our lives.  She rubs up against Tipo every chance that he allows her to...and runs along next to him every time he goes anywhere in the house.   I still take him for rides in the basket of my bike.  He mostly sits and occasionally barks but mostly just seems to love being with me, outside and getting a good look at the neighborhood.  His little eyes look a little cloudy these days, but he never misses a dog or a squirrel when we are riding our usual route.  He lets out a bark or two and the settles back down in his basket with his blanket and the little remaining piece of his dear bunny.  

We pet him and snuggle with him as much as possible and give him a full body scratch every day.  He is aging in every way...but still has the big dog attitude wrapped in a cute little guy body.  

I'VE DECIDED....I DEFINITELY WANT TO COME BACK AS A CAT...

 

My husband and I have had the pleasure of sharing our space with many cats and kittens over the years.  First on our hobby farms and now in our in-town home.  

While living on our several hobby farms, any cat passing through was offered daily food and water and a place to sleep.  In our big barn, we would put out dry and canned food and water every morning.  And there was a big, dry hay loft full of straw (and blankets) in which to cuddle up and sleep. During especially cold snaps in the winter months, we would hang heat lights in various (safe) spots - not in the hay loft - so that they could stay warm during the coldest of nights. I don't remember seeing any cats under the heat lights...but, I do remember seeing our peacocks under them rather than roosting as they usually did.  

My heart went out to these homeless, helpless animals and we did all that we could to feed them, love them and keep them alive.  Our hearts also took in sheep, goats, horses and whatever other animal or bird that needed a home...It's all been so worth it.  We received much more love and joy from them, than we could ever give.  Often times, obviously pregnant cats would wander into our farm, and we would take extra care of these mama's and their kittens.  

Usually, a few would stick around, but generally, they would move on.  Even though I felt like it, I wasn't going to trap them in somewhere...only offer them food, water and a safe place to stay, medical treatment if they needed it, until they felt that they needed to leave.  

Fast forward to the selling of our last hobby farm in Wisconsin. And our move into an old log cabin in the north woods of UP Michigan.  We also purchased an intown Victorian house to stay in while we were renovating the log cabin on 40 acres.  Renovating the log cabin was by far the hardest renovation we had ever taken on.  The hand-hewn logs were over 100 years old.  It was a heavy duty, dirty renovation.  The log cabin had been used as a 'camp' for hunters for many years since the original owners had lived there.  

We would take Tipo back and forth with us between the log cabin and the in-town Victorian.  But, we would leave Sadie and our parrot at the in-town house.  We would be there most every night to shower and sleep.  They were fine.  We were not going to take them out to the log cabin until we were done with the renovation.  Often times, the doors are open...windows are open and it would just not be safe to have them there.  Many times, depending upon what we were working on...we would leave Tipo in the truck...which he loves.  

 Sadie, our cat and April, our parrot would be so happy when we would arrive back in town.  And, Tipo would be happy to be home also.  

I love our evenings in town mostly to watch our Sadie. She just comes and goes, all over the house, as she pleases.  She had so many windows to sit at and watch the neighborhood.,  We have a glass door at the back of the house and we feed birds/squirrels at a table right outside that door.  It's her favorite place to be.  After her favorite view of the feeding table, she naps, eats...gets a case of the zoomies once in a while and then will rub up against any part of us to receive snuggles and pets.  She always purrs like a little happy motor.  I've put together a cardboard box with all of her 'stuff'...which she jumps into and then proceeds to empty out every day.  I gather it all up once she leaves for another adventure and always add something new that she might like...crinkled up paper, a bag, a bell, a feather...I craft a lot...so my supply of fun stuff is endless.

She will come when we call her.  When we're not sure where she is, we call her and soon we can hear here sweet 'conversations' coming down the stairs, from upstairs or coming upstairs from downstairs.   And then, she continues telling us...whatever...once she is on our lap or rubbing up against us.  I like to think that she is telling us about everything that is going on in our neighborhood when we are out at the log cabin.  She has several windows, with pillows, that she sits at upstairs and watches the world go by.  

No stress...no problems...just food, naps and love.  

As I get older, that's all I that I want also...so, I hope that when the day comes...I return as a cat that lives in a big, lovely home with a loving, fun family.

But, in my always busy head and big imagination (I'm a writer of whimsical stories) I think that I might actually come back as a cat that lives outdoors, in a big city, kind of the God Mother of the streets of the neighborhood.    Often getting into arguments and sometimes fights...but always surviving and helping others less fortunate. Making deals with local shop owners for food and protecting others when they need protecting.  Just kind of strolling around like I own the neighborhood. Always helping others find food and warm, dry places to sleep.  

The big loving home sounds wonderful, but the street smart, city dwelling crusader sounds pretty perfect also. Whichever will be fine with me...as long as I am a cat....